Feline Infinity

2017-09-04 15.07.38

Your cat curls up for a nap. As he drifts off to sleep, his mind races across galaxies, through the time-space continuum. His intelligence, far superior to that of a mere human, unravels the mysteries of the universe as he is immersed in the infinite wisdom of the quantum field.

As he returns to the mortal plane of existence, he walks into the kitchen,  prepared to explain the origins of the universe.  Being much smarter than us, cats can speak an unlimited number of human languages, but prefer to communicate with one another using the much more complex dialect our limited comprehension interprets as “meow.”

Your cat is about to explain how the concepts of the Big Bang and Intelligent design are actually compatible, when he hears, “Does kitty want a treat?”  or “What are you meowing about? Does your litter box need to be cleaned?” Although cats are very intelligent, they are easily distracted. Your cat forgets what he was about to tell you and is more than pleased that you’re opening a bag of his favourite treats or going downstairs to clean his litter box.

All across the face of the Earth, scientists are missing the opportunity to finally understand the mysteries of the universe, because they’re too busy opening cat food cans and scooping litter boxes.

Copyright © 2017 by J. Paul Cooper